Jeoffrey

One reviewer here delivers a harsh truth about fan service on her profile (I am not going to disclose her username; search!). I saw how true this statement was once again while watching the first episode of Hip Whip Girl: Keijo!!!!!! (it really has too many exclamation points in the title.). When a girl wants to see fan service in an anime series with swimsuits, she goes for Free! although I have not seen that particular anime series. However, I suppose my idea is that a group of nice, well-proportioned boys parades around in swimsuits most of the time, dealing with their problems and being sensitive and charismatic. I do not know; I am just guessing that is what it is about because I have not even started watching Free! Why not? Because most guys are usually not interested in watching other men in swimsuits (even if they are only illustrations) and charismatic, sensitive male protagonists dealing with their problems would just be quite boring really. That is simply the reality of it. So OK, but what if a young man longs for some swimsuit fan service action? Well, there is Hip Whip Girl: Keijo!!!!!! What is that young man to expect? First and foremost, there will be some boobies (sorry for that particular term, although for certain bust sizes, I do not think any other description actually fits), then bottoms, then well-proportioned female bodies in swimsuits. Then, of course, there is some action, whether in the form of boobie to boobie fights or action along the lines of "you have got a tight ass, I have to feel it." There are the assorted whiny characters (because that is how some guys see women) speaking in different dialects (because that is exotic). There is maybe a hint of a narrative and some trouble may be lurking somewhere in the distance, lost among all the bagpipes. However, is there any need for a decent narrative? A substantial enough group of men are going to assume the English word "plot" is just another name for deep cleavage anyway, so who cares? Unfortunately, Jeoffrey needs a lot more to be entertained by anime series these days than just fan service and action. So my prediction regarding this show is probably this - the main female protagonist is going to be competing against other well-proportioned classmates in most of the episodes; her cute ass and boobies will get to know many other asses and boobies in some dynamic contests. She is going to learn the latest crazy techniques and meet lots of friends and rivals, each with a unique character and way of speaking. At least once per episode, there will be some "close contact" between the girls outside the pool (in the first episode, the main female protagonist + the blonde girl). We get a look at the spa in the middle of the anime series because those assets need to be shown in other ways than merely restricted to a swimsuit. Plot-wise, it is going to be the same as ninety-nine percent of classic sports anime series, so competitions, wins, losses, training, camaraderie, and rivalries. There will either be a tournament or an important test in the end. If there is going to be a test, then the female protagonist is going to shine. If, however, there is going to be a tournament, then the female protagonist is going to finish second with the realization that she still has some way to go, and the audience is going to realize that there is probably going to be a second season in the works. This anime series is going to be very popular because there is pretty much everything an ecchi fan (usually a young male in the fifteen to twenty-five-year-old age bracket, even though there is also a decent portion of males over twenty-five years old) could want. On top of that, there are the standard shonen action scenes (again, usually targeted at young males aged fifteen to twenty-five years old) and a certain amount of the drive that sports anime series have. In other words, if I were fifteen again, I might have my tongue hanging out drooling and throw five stars away. However, the older a person gets, the more their preferences change. So I would rather gush over the cuteness of the little Lolita girls in frilly magical girl costumes, or playing table tennis that makes me smile, or the odd interesting girls playing brass instruments or fighting the Third Reich. I am going to keep waiting to see if I get a decent, interesting narrative this season to engage my brain. This is because that is precisely the organ I want to get my blood pumping around while watching anime series. Hip Whip Girl: Keijo!!!!!! is a dream come true for fans of swimsuits and erotic anime series. For Jeoffrey, however, this is yet another anime series that is dropped without a rating after the first episode.

I've Always Liked You is a charming romantic movie with a relaxed pace and the animation is quite respectable. It also features some charming characters and a pleasant soundtrack. Basically, I cannot think of anything substantial to complain about. On the other hand, although I spent a very enjoyable hour watching this movie, I reckon that in a few days, I am probably only going to vaguely remember having seen "I've Always Liked You." So it is pleasant and enjoyable, although it somehow lacked any real impact. I wonder if it needed some dramatic tension to at least spice up the narrative a bit or if it lacked something else. However, I do not know the answer to that question. So the fact remains that this movie is actually a respectable love story, albeit without any suspense. This is because you can predict the ending after about twenty minutes and during the next forty minutes, almost nothing happens to make you change your mind. So I finally found something to criticize, and I can finally take one star off the rating because the writing of this movie was nice, even though it was still lacking something, and awarding five stars is just not my style (why should it be that easy, right?). 7.5/10.

Four boys in prison uniforms escape from the most high-security prison in the world! It is all shimmering and glittering, and one of the men has blue nails. Where did he find nail polish in that prison? However, the really crappy thing is that I was not even remotely impressed with the traps in this show. So if you do not like the animation style or the characters, the introduction to the plot is so rubbish it is not funny, then the conclusion is logical. Run away, quickly! Run before you get caught! Dropped after the first episode.

Oh my God, this is so perfectly moronic!! Its cuteness is incredibly over-the-top, and it is completely stupid and predictable. The animation is not very good, which on the one hand, looks terribly simple, almost to the point of being a bit of a cop-out, but on the other hand, it actually suits this show. The characters are unbelievably flat; the main female protagonist is not a girl, she is simply just a puppy dog, and there are also some stupid tropes about big boobies and who knows what else. On the one hand, the action is dynamic; on the other hand, it is quite a weird show because of the liters of sweat and the strange ball movement. However, somehow even this fits in strangely. Practically after a few minutes of the first episode, I had a smile on my face as if I was afflicted with polio, and the pleasant feeling that emerged while watching lasted despite all the obvious shortcomings (and there are quite a few) until the end. It is just that this is so endearingly stupid that it is actually cool! At least it was for me. 8/10.

The only genre tagged for Touken Ranbu: Hanamaru on MAL was fantasy, so I figured why not check it out. This show is not so much a fantasy anime series; it is just the opposite of my favorite "cute girls do cute things" type-entertainment. By “opposite” of course I mean it is about boys, from little shonen to big bishies. So the target audience is quite obvious, and there is the occasional fight scene which is unfortunately not really worth watching. I could not enjoy this show because it is just frantic sequences of crazy and cluttered cutscenes. Dropped after ten minutes, and I am not going to judge it or rate it.

I originally thought WWW.Working!! was going to be a fully-fledged fourth season of the anime series Wagnaria!!, which I dropped after one episode a while back because I did not find it very interesting. Well, basically, if I understand correctly, WWW.Working!! is set in a Wagnaria restaurant and follows a different group of characters. Plus, I cannot help but be intrigued this time around, although I am not going to last more than one episode this time around either. There is too much unnecessary chibi for my taste, and if I do not laugh even once watching a “comedy” that is supposed to have completely wacky characters, then it is probably not for me. I do not think it will be a total flop, and I would even say it will have its fans, but I am not going to be there, as I have been in years past with other works from the Working!! franchise. Dropped after the first episode and I am not rating it.

Obviously, the Time Bokan universe is intertwined with the Yatterman universe because the bad guys in this show are just a copy of the Doronbo gang. Plus, even the concept is very similar to what I saw in the 2008 Yatterman anime series. Sure, this show is a weird freak show, an assortment of mecha, talking creatures, weird jokes, rewriting history, and lots of other strange things. However, Yatterman was all about that too. OK, so then I cannot find a reason to watch this anime series in particular. This is especially true when I find the characters so much worse than those in Yatterman, and even the attempts at wit did not make me laugh during the first episode. I might have even given it a chance if it had had an interesting storyline, like Yatterman Night from 2015. However, this show is just some crazy fooling around with history in typical Japanese style, and honestly, I have basically had enough of that, once was enough. Dropped after the first episode and I am not rating it.

Where to start? I thought the soundtrack was good. I liked some songs much more than those in the previous movie, My Little Pony Equestria Girls: Friendship Games, and I liked them as much as those in the first two movies. The characters are still fine, and I have got used to their likenesses as well, although I found the pacing and narrative weaker this time around. The pacing was really slow, the narrative was too simple and was not all that gripping, and the storyline was almost devoid of any suspense. Plus, the problems of the teenage female protagonists and all the love story elements kind of bored me. All in all, the impression I got is still good; however, once again, it was not quite right, so once again, only four stars - 7/10.

A feature-length movie with Final Fantasy (FF) in the title is practically always an event. While it is almost always a marketing ploy to draw attention to the role-playing video game franchise, it is also always a beautiful demonstration of how the quality of "made in Japan" CGI animation has improved. Simply put, if you have a decent budget and experience in making computer games, then the result is almost always at least watchable. The main problem with both of the previous movies, and what I am always kind of afraid of with FF movies, is the main narrative. Either it is basically about nothing, like Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within was, or the plot is so closely tied to the role-playing video game that the uninitiated viewer will find it hard to get into it (Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children). Here we basically have an introduction to the new role-playing video game that is coming out, even though the movie also has quite a bit of room for its own narrative because the main male protagonist is not the main character from the upcoming role-playing video game. Well, it is not all bad; there are battles, there is politics, and it has got some atmosphere. The characters are not bad and are very well dubbed (I have seen the English version). I did wonder for a while during the first battle sequence if I was watching the new Starship Troopers movie, although I liked the final clash and the circumstances leading up to it. Frankly speaking, the new FF movie ends rather well, translated into numbers - 7.7/10.

This movie basically works well as a children's tale about how even natural enemies can become friends. There is a pretty charming and simple narrative that a little rugrat could find interesting. For me, as a thirty-something adult, it was still quite enjoyable, even though at the same time it seemed terribly over-the-top, naive, and strange. I was rolling my eyes at times during some of the really extremely sweet moments. The two main protagonists were fine, even though I found their intense relationship and the incredible strength of their friendship just felt too unbelievable. In the end, instead of a feeling of satisfaction, the only thought that ran through my head was how Czech singer Martha Kubisova's song "There Must Be Paradise Somewhere" would have suited the credits. In other words, this was so overly sweet in places that it built a defensive reaction in my body in the form of cynicism, which has not happened to me in a long time when watching cute anime movies, and somehow, I cannot bring myself to award this more than 5/10.