Jeoffrey

The Asylum, the independent movie company, and distributor is known for its "megahits" like Sharknado and Mega Shark Versus Crocosaurus. They are going to make a new version of Lord of the Rings. It will feature Kevin Sorbo as Aragorn, Hulk Hogan as Legolas, and the unforgettable Steven Seagal as Gimly. You are probably thinking I have gone crazy and wondering in vain how this relates to the new anime series Berserk. Well, try to imagine what I have just described and also try to imagine the result of what I have described. You still do not get it? All right, then, well, on the one hand, this is a classic fantasy adventure device, the holy grail, whose story a lot of people know by heart. So you know the characters are great, the narrative will be great, and everything is just as it should be with a fantasy adventure. However, on the other hand, there is a TV studio producing low-budget movies, C-movies, and whatever the hell movies for a select group of enthusiasts. (I am not criticizing anyone because, as a fan of moe, I have seen a few of Lindenfilm's and Millepensee's productions). What do you get out of this movie? At best, a passable B-movie that none of the die-hard fans of the prequel will want to talk much about, a few people will be interested, and some will even award it five stars because it is "Lord of the Rings" after all. At worst, an unwatchable experiment with bad cinematography, crazy effects, and unpleasant acting will put most people off. A few people will disassociate themselves from it, and a few will still award it five stars because it is "Lord of the Rings". So what is the new Berserk like? At first, it looked like a mega-fuck up; the animation is something a normal person would not want to watch, the movement of the characters is peculiar, and some of the characters, like Puck, are pretty awful. Plus, the opening skips some pretty interesting chapters of the manga. I think the only thing that saves the new adaptation of Berserk is the fact that the anime's creators stick to the source material quite well, so the dark narrative, the gore, violence, and sex, all the "good stuff" that people were looking forward to is more or less there. Sure, they try to make the action-packed scenes look epic, even though the terrible way the characters move spoils it. It is extremely gory, and there are a lot of sex scenes, even though they censored the genitalia and nipples, which takes away from the effect (although it is still much better than the irritating light beams obscuring we get in other anime series). However, even so, I slowly came to realize that it is actually watchable and that it has an atmosphere too. Even though I am still irritated by the execution, if the anime's creators had gone the traditional animation route and avoided visual experimentation, this could have been a very good anime series. In the end, Berserk is more of an average anime series because I know the characters and narrative are generally good (Guts is the best character, of course, and anyone who says he has no charisma obviously knows nothing about the meaning of that word). The action and atmosphere are passable; the soundtrack is very good; however, the animation is terrible. I am awarding it 6/10, mainly because of the narrative and Guts. Also, I will definitely be watching more episodes of this in 2017.

Ghost Talker's Daydream is an occasionally quite interesting ghost story with a rather peculiar main female protagonist. It has an interesting atmosphere, quite strange characters, and a bit of uncensored erotica with a few S+M costumes. 6/10.

Dear children, be careful when you eat bananas because you never know how many little kittens will die! The Japanese are extremely inventive; however, this is something so supremely unique that it is only going to appeal to a small group of very specific and unique individuals. Just like with the Teletubbies. In other words, take Hello Kitty, add the word that every fan of the Minions from Despicable Me is clamoring for - "banana," and success is guaranteed! Wait, but what about Jeoffrey? Well, he is just shaking his head in disbelief. Dropped after the first episode.

So I am going to be a bit more strict than the reviewer SonGokussj and say not only that the editing is bad, but that the choice of some of the shots, where the camera pointed, is quite strange in places. The animation is incredibly static at times. The opening part in the school, for example, did not appeal to me. There were single shots of characters talking and moving quite minimally. As an interesting counterpoint, the animation when the fights occur is quite action-packed. These are quite well-executed, and the close combat using martial arts looked pretty good although that was not so much the case with the movement of the characters at other times. I also did not find the art style particularly sophisticated, more like quite poor. Another shortcoming is the unnaturally shoved-in fan service. Some of the storylines ended with this "service to the audience" and were completely stupid (see the fifth episode and the ping pong). On the whole, as far as the narrative is concerned, it is also quite crap. The different factions are clear about what they want; some want to be the strongest and rule the world, others want to wage war on everyone, defeat everyone and rule the world, and the main male protagonist Akatsuka Justice - well, he just wants world peace. It is full of such stupid tropes, like the speeches of many of the beauty queen pageant finalists. Plus, the characters are acting kind of weird and unnatural, too. It just does not feel like it came together as a whole, and about the only time it was watchable was when there were fight scenes. However, I noticed some weaknesses and small details that spoiled the impression I got of the show'. (When Akatsuka Justice is hit several times with a sword, there is blood all around and under him, so how is it possible that a moment later, when he throws a "power-up," his shirt is suddenly clean? It is magic!) So I am sorry, however, like SonGokussj, I am not going to watch more than five episodes. 2/10.

Based on the trailer, this show was more or less exactly what I expected. It is quite a charming, pleasant, and touching show. Admittedly, they were forcing the emotional aspect a bit too much; however, it was not distracting in any way. I like the animation, even though I would have had the soundtrack quieter at times. Sensei was a likable character as a single stay-at-home dad, and he has my respect. The little girl was incredibly adorable and had an interesting voice, and just the way she pronounces "otousan" is very interesting. Granted, little Tsumugi was also slightly spoiled at times, even though there were almost no scenes where I found her irritating. The student was also quite intriguing, and well, I took her fear of knives as more of an odd quirk than something to be bothered by. In other words, this show has a pleasant slice-of-life narrative, with lots of food and demonstrations of its preparation, which is not dramatic or extremely interesting in any way. Nevertheless, I was satisfied because this kind of pleasant respite suits me. 7.5/10.

This is another anime series in the style of Mushishi, or Natsume’s Book of Friends, where the world is teeming with mysterious creatures. In this show, youkai (demons) are once again there, although they are not actually evil, rather just misunderstood. So, some kind of main male protagonist character is needed to exorcize them or try to help them, and the people possessed by them. Unfortunately, in terms of the main characters' depth, interest, and charisma, it was only remotely close to what is referred to in the title mentioned above. Sure there was that nice "feeling" at times, although it certainly was not anything intense, and most importantly, it never lasted more than a few minutes. Some of the episodes were slightly above average; the final storyline and denouement were again a massive cliché. Still, it was quite likable at times, even though it did not go very deep, and in fact, the main thing it brought me is the fact that I am now much more looking forward to the new season of the much better-produced "Natsume's Book of Friends" 5.5/10.

The first episode is just beautiful! I was expecting it to be well-produced, and considering the fact that I had seen the previous movie called Tales of Zestiria: Dawn of the Shepherd, I knew what I was getting into. However, it is clear that the Ufotable studio has gone the extra mile again concerning the animation here because this is just visual pornography! The water! The fire! The tornadoes! The fighting! The city! The fire-breathing dragon! The introduction was simply a treat that whetted my appetite for more. The animation is stunningly beautiful, and visually this is simply one of the top releases of the year. The only shame is that we do not also have a properly epic and coherent narrative to go with such gorgeous animation. Sure I could forgive them for a lot of things; however, the fact that they devoted two whole episodes to advertising their upcoming action role-playing video game Tales of Berseria left me wondering what the point of this was besides marketing and that just kind of pisses me off. Leaving that interjection aside, after watching the first season, I just have to reiterate that ToZ is an average fantasy adventure with beautiful audiovisual design, but unfortunately, nothing more than that. 7/10.

The best action "gastroporn" is back in full swing! The main ingredient is action, the suspense could be cut with a knife, and a dash of humor is thrown in to taste. This is all served up by old friends and great chefs. I do not recommend watching this show on an empty stomach, or perhaps at midnight. And now, please excuse me, I am going to go and eat the contents of the fridge. 9/10.

So the ecchi genre has made a step forward once again. Just in the first few minutes, I thought that if they dropped the underwear and added real "action," we would actually have hentai. From the clumsy attempts of shy male protagonists and the eroticism of stupid blunders, we finally slowly got to what I, give or take, think of as erotica. So we have sensual, planned, and consensual touching and sexual tension. Well, too bad, gentlemen, because there is also censorship in this show. That is because Japan is a country where they probably know how to enjoy sex. They have invented many interesting techniques and gadgets, although they are still ashamed of nudity and cannot risk children seeing it. In addition, the screenwriters of erotic anime series have had almost no imagination in the last few years, so another major drawback is the fact that once again, we are slowly but surely piling cliché upon cliché. The setting is a magical school, the characters look like cookie-cutter stereotypes, and the enemy is once again a digital something that attacked Earth because, well, who knows? Plus, the only thing that can stop it is special warriors in uniforms so tight that it baffles any reasonable logic. So if you like animated erotica and do not mind that there is most likely not going to be some real sex, or if you are a fan of magical schools, girls with massive oppai, or have not found any proper pornography site yet, then this will be the anime series for you. However, Jeoffrey is not going to watch it with you because 1. I am tired of clichés 2. I rarely get turned on by animated erotica 3. I find football-sized oppai disturbing, not attractive 4. I know a few pornographic websites. I am sure that this is going to quickly find its fans, and I am not judging anyone, so I wish you all a good time. Dropped after the first episode, and I am not rating it.

Muromi-san is all about a mermaid who falls in love with a young fisherman and her very special friends. There were a lot of silly jokes, and some of the jokes were very good, while others were a bit crap. Unfortunately, there was a fair amount that was silly. Sometimes I had a good laugh; sometimes, I was very strongly charmed by the cuteness; however, all too often, I was simply watching, thinking this is just not on! Once again, this is one of those madcap Japanese classics where there is plenty of stuff you would never think of, albeit at the same time, there is plenty of silly sex jokes, failed innuendos, and sheer fan service that will be pleasing to some. However, such stuff rarely impresses Jeoffrey. The characters were fine; their interactions with each other mostly worked, though sometimes a joke falling flat could pretty much ruin it. The animation is simple, quite decently colored, and again some characters have eyes covering half their heads, even though I personally do not mind that I find it rather cute. I did not notice the soundtrack much apart from the pleasantly crazy opening, so I guess it was not so bad. Although that is not the case, it may look like I was not too impressed with Muromi-san. I am complaining about the bad jokes in this show. However, their ratio of bad to good ones was about fifty-fifty. The appropriately chosen footage enhanced my impression of the show, and I thought it gave it a respectable amount of momentum. There were also the likable and cute characters of which I liked Yeti, Harpy, and Muromi-san. So my final impression is slightly above average. 6.4/10.